Motherhood isn’t something I had dreamed of my whole life. I never aspired to carry that heavy title.
In all honesty, I was on the fence about whether to have a child or not. I really enjoyed the wanderlust lifestyle I shared with my husband – traveling the world with a backpack, 40 mile all-day mountain bike rides, or driving hours to park our van in 10 degree temps overnight to get fresh powder turns in the morning. But if we choose to expand our family, I was committed to being an outdoor mom who still lived life outside.
Call us crazy, but we lived a good life filled with adventure, freedom, and passport stamps. And it was all about to change. While we expected our lifestyle to shift, we refused to fully give up our love of travel and the outdoors. Since he was born, we started integrating our son our outdoor activities. It’s a lot of work, but it’s always (well, most of time) worth it.
As an active individual, here are 5 things I wish I knew before becoming an outdoor mom.
1) Your lifestyle will change, but you don’t have to give up your life.
I never stopped walking. When my son was born, I hiked with him daily in a front pack as an infant; it was my only guaranteed naptime. As he got older, I transitioned to a backpack to carry him. Now, at almost 2 years old, he walks the trail, but prefers to be on his strider.
At 5 weeks old, we tested out an overnight trip in our van in a location close by. It was actually much easier than we expected it to be. Bedtime was between 7-8pm, which left us the rest of the evening to ourselves. Sitting around the campfire, we had a monitor and weren’t far away.
At 10 weeks old, we set out on a cross country road trip from Colorado to California. After the second night, we jumped out of bed, shocked he had slept through the night. 12 HOURS though the night. Panicked, we checked his breathing. He was fine. We thought it was a fluke, but it happened again the next two nights in the van. Little guy was tired from all the new places and change of scenery.
What we are doing now to accommodate a two year old will change again in a few months. As they grow, we have to keep adjusting our strategy. Just don’t give up. Be creative in where you go and what you do. The more you continue to integrate your kids into your life, the easier it will get.
2) You will ski (or bike, climb, etc) again.
You will ski again. I remind myself of this constantly when I miss out on powder days. For those who are addicted to snow, you know how hard this is. Yes, we live in a ski town, but every day counts. A good day on the mountain is filled with smiles and good vibes as you float through the soft snow. It’s what dreams are made of. While my husband and I always used to head out and ski all day and weekend together, now we trade off half days on the mountain or find a safe and mellow place to skin.
Yes, it’s hard missing out on good snow and the camaraderie of skiing with friends, but in a couple years, he’ll be able to keep up. There will also be ski school so we can reclaim our days again. And soon enough, we’ll all be skiing together as a family.
“It’s only temporary,” I repeat to myself as it snows.
3) You will become more patient as an outdoor mom.
Oh, has my patience been tested. Sometimes I keep it together and sometimes I have to walk away. This is normal, and it does not make you a bad mom.
The patience I’ve learned from my son translates to many other areas in my life. I find myself to be more tolerant and compassionate with friends and their tough situations. I savor the moment and don’t mind waiting for others on the trail or the mountain.
While we will all rush through life, I’ve also found a way to enjoy slowing down. Granted, I’m usually chasing him around these days, but here’s a slower cadence to our lives which we are embracing. It gives us a reason to explore new destinations that accommodate where we are in life these days.
4) It takes a village, so find your people.
It takes a village to raise a child. We’ve all heard the saying, but I never truly understood and embraced it until I became part of the village. It’s the only way to make things work and stay sane. Lean into your network, especially one that has other outdoor moms in it to adventure with.
We’ve had friends jump in to stick around during naptime (the easiest part of the day), while we sneak outside for an activity. Or the time when our friend picked up our son at daycare in full ski gear (boots included) and carried him in one arm, skis and poles in the other, across the street to a BBQ joint because a snowstorm had closed all the roads. It was an impressive feat. I was stuck an hour behind, waiting for the roads to clear. His wife, who had a newborn + 2 more at home, was supposed to pick him up, but I was able to give him a ride home since I was already on my way. It was a win-win all around.
More often, we prefer to travel and camp with other outdoor moms and families so we can tag team riding bikes. We trade off watching each other’s kids to have girls and guys rides, or sometimes couples rides. The littles entertain each other and we all enjoy our outdoor time. It’s also more fun to have someone to hang out with during naptime.
Of course, we lean on grandparents when they come to visit. Date day is outside time together and we appreciate that solo time now more than ever before.
5) Embrace each stage, it goes quickly.
Someone once told me that you have a new baby/child every 6 months. It’s true. They are constantly changing. Find ways to embrace where you are.
As a newborn, they are a lot of work and you are exhausted. But they are little, immobile, lightweight, and sleep a lot. So we hiked all the time. In the winter, we took him skinning with us and fed him a bottle before we skied down. No, we weren’t doing resort laps, but we still found ways to get outside with him.
In the winter, we use a Burley trailer with a ski kit attachment for skinning and cross country skiing. I wasn’t skiing the same places, but we were both getting outside. He’s cozy in his own space with snacks and entertainment, so we’re all happy.
Now that he’s 2, he still likes being carried in the pack, but we let him walk for whatever portion he can. It’s short, a few hundred yards, a quarter mile, but slowly, the distance and his stamina will increase. A strider bike is a game changer, as he can bike faster and farther than he can walk.
Designed for kids aged 2-5, the Mac-Ride is a bike seat that attaches to your bike frame so your little one can sit in between your arms and hold onto your handlebars. Kids sitting on the bars are rewarded with the same view and experience as you and most of them seem to love the ride.
Final Thoughts
I’ve always found it important to expose my kids to everything I love, including traveling and adventuring. It’s not always perfect and it’s definitely not easy; there are tantrums, he can get cranky, or bored, but we adjust and keep trying.
Every phase with kids is different and you will like some better than others. You may not even realize things have changed until you’ve outgrown a phase.
Find the good in where you are and be creative in how you integrate your kids based on their ability at the time. Because one day, they will be waiting for you, mama.
